知っておきたい通夜・葬式の参列マナー:供花を送る際の注意点

葬儀の際に祭壇に飾る供花は、その場を飾る意味合いもありますが、故人の魂を慰め、盛大に見送る意味合いもあります。

自分の好みの花を勝手に選ぶと、マナー違反となる可能性がありますので、お花を選ぶ際には、専門家や葬祭場の担当者に相談するといいでしょう。

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供花を用意する関係者と設置の仕方

葬儀場に飾るのは、従来では会場の外も飾り付ける意味合いもあり、スペースを設けて造花の花輪を飾ることがありました。

現在では、斎場やホール、寺院や神社、教会などの宗教施設等の室内で葬儀が執り行われることがほとんどのため、社葬や合同葬のような盛大な葬儀でない限り、好んで使われる機会が少なくなりました。

祭壇に供えるのは、スタンドに活けられた花が多いでしょう。故人の祭壇を中心に、故人に近い関係の子供や孫、兄弟などの親族の用意した花が飾られていきます。

左右一対で飾られますが、兄弟までの近い親族に限られる場合が多いでしょう。身内でない場合は、1基分で構わないでしょう。

両端に行くに従って、遠い身内になり、親しい友人や仕事関係で付き合いのあった贈り主の花が並べられます。友人や身内の場合は、直接葬儀に出られなかった方が、故人に弔意を表す意味で贈ることもあります。

供花を飾り付けるのは、葬儀の前までに済ませられるように手配します。

葬祭場によっては、路面店等で購入した花の持ち込みは禁止されていることがあり、葬儀社から直接購入するか、提携の業者から手続きをする必要があります。

枕花とはどのようなものか

枕花は、文字通り故人の枕元に置いて飾る花です。意味合いは供花と同じように、魂を慰めるために飾られる花です。

故人と近い関係にある身内が用意するのがマナーですが、故人の友人や幼なじみなど親しい関係の方で、遺族に喜ばれるのであればお供えしても構いません。

飾るタイミングとしては、マナーとして決められているわけではなく、通夜の前に用意します。亡くなってすぐに飾っても、問題がありません。

枕元に置くため、かごやオアシスなどに挿されたフラワーアレンジメントであることが多く、葬式の時に飾るスタンド花よりも、小ぶりなことが多いです。

自宅に飾られた後、出棺の時には、一緒に葬祭場に持ち込んで構いません。可能であれば、棺の枕側に花を置き、故人から見える位置で寂しくないようにして供えるといいでしょう。

お葬式が終わった後は、自宅に持ち帰り祭壇の横に飾ります。基本的に、枯れた花があった場合は取り除いて、小さくまとめ直すことができるように、生花店で配慮されていることがあります。

スポンジに挿して、背後から水を入れられるようになっている物が多いです。全ての花が終わるまで、祭壇の横に置いておけます。

神式と仏式の葬式で使われる花

供花は、宗教によって使える花に違いがある場合があります。分からなければ、葬祭場の担当者や葬儀社の方に聞いて確かめるようにしてください。

宗教施設で行う場合は、花の種類や色が指定されることがありますので、施設の責任者に尋ねるといいでしょう。

仏式と神式の場合は、白い色調の花を使うのがマナーです。

仏式の場合は、黄色や紫などの地味な色合いであれば、アクセントとして使ったり、枕花として使うことができますが、神式の場合は、基本的に白い花のみを中心に使うことになります。

仏式でも、住職の希望があれば、供花のうち1種類は白だけの花を用意するように依頼されることもあります。花の種類としては、和の花が多く、大輪の菊からスプレー菊まで様々な種類の菊が使われます。

仏式では、黄色や紫の菊も用いられます。蘭や百合などの、白い花も使われます。胡蝶蘭の場合は、鉢植えの状態で枕花として供える方も多いです。

花言葉は幸せが飛んでくるという内容ですが、花と花弁が白い場合は、清純という意味もありますし、花弁も白一色で、立ち姿が荘厳な所から葬式に相応しい花とされ、人気があります。

キリスト教式の葬式で使う花

キリスト教式でも、基本的に白を基調にした花を使うのがマナーです。落ち着いた色合いであれば、少々色が入っても問題ありませんが、華美になりすぎないように気をつけましょう。

使われる花は、菊などの和の花はあまり使われず、小さめの白いスプレー菊が使われることがあります。百合やカーネーションなどの白い花が中心で、造花を使うのはマナー違反となります。

近年では、宗教に関係なく生花を使う斎場がほとんどですが、キリスト教式の葬式では生花を供えるようにしてください。

キリスト教式の葬儀では、スタンドや花輪を飾る習慣はありません。供花として贈るのであれば、自宅から持ち運びがしやすいようにかごに入った形状になります。

枕花と同様の扱いとなり、自宅で故人に供えた後に、葬祭場に持ち込んで、終わった後に自宅に飾ることになります。お供えするのであれば、持ちやすさを考慮して、小さめのアレンジメントを用意するよう心がけましょう。

仏式や神式の供花と違って、木札を付けないのも特徴です。マナー違反になる恐れがありますので、札を付けないようにしましょう。

アレンジメントについては、ハートや聖書の形など、特徴的に形作ることが認められている場合もあります。

最後に

葬儀の供花には、宗教によって様々な違いがあります。全てに共通しているのは、バラやアザミなどの棘がある花は供花として相応しくないと言われています。

故人が好きな花だったとしても、避けるようにするといいでしょう。

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