知っておきたい通夜・葬式の参列マナー:お悔やみメールのポイントと注意点

今は、メールでなんでも連絡のやり取りを行う時代です。突然の訃報をご遺族の方から、メールで連絡されるという可能性もあります。

メールで連絡がきた場合に返信する、お悔みメールのマナーをチェックしておきましょう。

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そもそもお悔みのメールはOK?

葬儀の連絡などをメールで受け取った場合、そもそもお悔やみメールを返信するのはマナー違反にはならないのか、不安に感じる方も多いのではないでしょうか。

メールでお悔やみを伝えるのは形式上では、正式なものではないものの関係性や状況によっては、マナー違反にはなりません。

お悔やみメールを送っていいケースとしては、メールで訃報の連絡や、葬儀の日程などを受けた場合が挙げられます。また、メールの送り主が友人・知人など親しい間柄でも有効です。

この他に、仕事の取引先担当者、会社の上司・同僚といったビジネス関連の間柄の方に、お悔やみメールするのも問題ありません。

ただし、親族などからの訃報メールに対して、お悔やみのメールをするのはマナー違反となるので注意が必要です。このようなケースでは、電話でお悔やみを伝えるのがベストとされています。

お悔やみのメールは、あくまで略式ですので、親族以外の関係性が深い方や、ビジネス上の関係性がある方に取り急ぎ、連絡を行うツールとして使うのが良いでしょう。

ただし、メールの内容にもマナーがあるので、確認しておく事が大切です。

お悔やみのメールマナーを確認

ご遺族の方にお悔やみのメールを送信するという場合、様々なマナーを守らなければいけません。例えば、時候の挨拶等の前置きはせず、シンプルにお悔やみの言葉を伝えるのが基本です。

悲しい気持ちを伝える為に、長いメールを送信してしまいがちですが、ご遺族の方は葬儀の準備や大切な家族を失った喪失感から、長いメールに目を通す余裕はありません。

手短に用件を伝えるという事が、お悔やみメールの基本的なマナーです。件名も簡潔に用件が分かるように、書くようにしましょう。

件名は件名は、「(自分の名前)よりお悔やみ申し上げます」といった、すぐに誰からのメールか分かるように工夫します。

取引先へのお悔やみメールであれば、自分の名前だけでなく、会社名や所属先もプラスして書くようにします。略式とはいっても、やはりお悔やみの言葉を伝えるメールですので、丁寧な言葉使いにします。

親しい友人の場合、くだけた口調のメールを打ってしまうケースもあるでしょうが、普段よりも丁寧な言葉使いを心がける事がメールのマナーとなっています。

使ってはいけない言葉とは

葬儀の場では、使うとふさわしくない言葉というものが存在します。お悔やみのメールであっても、使用するとマナー違反となる言葉があるので注意しましょう。

葬儀の場と同じく、メールでも重ね言葉を使うのはマナー違反です。重ね言葉とは、不幸を連想させる、重ね言葉の事を言います。「重ね重ね」「またまた」「再三」といった言葉が、重ね言葉に含まれます。

重ね言葉以外にも、忌み言葉を使わないようにする事も大切です。「死ぬ」「逝く」「これからも」「この先も」「追って」などの言葉は、葬儀の際に使う言葉としてはふさわしくありません。

ついつい使ってしまう言葉もあるので、注意しながらメールの文面を考える事をおすすめします。

「死去」や「死亡」といった言葉は、「御逝去」といった言葉に置き換える心使いも必要です。「生きていた頃」などは、「ご生前」「お元気な頃」と言い換えましょう。

葬儀の場やお悔みのメールでは、直接的な生死に対する表現を避ける事がマナーとなります。重ね言葉や忌み言葉を使わないのは、ご遺族に対する心使いという事を覚えておきましょう。

お悔みメールのメリット

メールでお悔やみを伝えるのは失礼かな?と感じる方も多いでしょう。しかし、メールで伝えるからこそ得られる、メリットというものもあります。

メールは、すぐに自分の気持ちを伝えられるツールです。お悔やみの気持ちや、悲しい気持ちをすぐに伝えられるという点はメリットと言えます。

また、ご遺族の方が時間関係なく、目を通す事が出来るという点もメールでお悔やみを伝えるメリットです。ご遺族の方は、葬儀の準備や弔問客への対応に追われます。

電話の場合、なかなか出る事が出来ないかもしれません。ですが、メールであれば自分の都合が良い時間に読む事が可能です。ご遺族の負担を考えるのであれば、メールでお悔やみを伝えるのも、決して失礼な事ではありません。

メールでお悔やみを伝える場合、一言言葉を添えやすいという点もメリットです。

「何かあったら力になるので、いつでも連絡してください」 、「仕事の方は気になさらずに、最後のお見送りをなさって下さい」 といった言葉をプラスする事で、より相手を思いやるメールを送る事が出来ます。

最後に

お悔やみをメールで伝えるという手段は、現代社会ではマナー違反とはなりません。ですが、メールを送る相手やメールの内容は、しっかり考える必要があります。

お悔やみメールのマナーを確認して、正しいメールを送るという事が大切です。

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